Regret
by Airotia
Summary: A story of regret and sympathy turning into real love. GaaLee SLASH


**Regret**

Kankuro thought it was funny, really. He and his siblings all had different ways of dealing with regret—he, himself, dealt with it by being an enormous asshole. Temari dealt with it by acting motherly to whomever she wronged—though that usually wasn't obvious. Gaara… Gaara didn't seem to actually take _any_ action whatsoever when he felt regret, other than hanging around the person, usually never saying a word to the person they wronged, waiting for them to get used to him again.

Of course, this was a new development. He had never cared before—he always just acted as if they were just there, practically ignoring them and anything they did or said.

But now, now that he was a _human_ being and not a monster, he was kinder, and actually felt guilt. He'd yelled at a secretary once for not bringing his coffee with sugar (Kankuro thought it was odd, but Gaara loathed coffee without sugar immensely), and then made her his personal secretary and gave her a raise in apology. She, had, of course, been shocked at what he did, since he did so after she had messed up, but accepted both with a graceful smile and inward cheers.

And made sure never to bring Gaara coffee without sugar again.

And then, a mysterious thing happened. Gaara got a letter, and after he received it, he became… distant. As if nothing was there but work. Usually, he was like that with everybody—except Temari and himself. Kankuro and Temari both knew something was wrong when he refused to talk to them, of all people, and they had decided to read that letter, at all costs.

It wasn't hard to sneak into his office. The guards outside didn't bother asking them for an appointment—even if he was in an appointment, Gaara would let them in. They only asked for identification, and Kankuro and Temari quickly presented their office I.D., especially made for them.

They walked over to his desk and shuffled through his things. A picture here, a bill here, a few mission notes there… And then they found it. Before Temari even opened it for the both of them to read, she knew it was from Naruto. She could tell from the seal used to enclose the letter, a leaf symbol with nine tails inside of it (a present Gaara had gotten him, since they constantly corresponded, and they had someone who made custom seals like that in Sunagakure). Temari's eyes skimmed through the letter, looking for anything out of the ordinary.

Kankuro had pointed it out when Temari's eyes missed it. _'Fuzzy 'Brows just got out of a second surgery on his leg. It wasn't as big of a surgery as last time, and there was no way he'd die. He's in a cast again, and Big 'Brow is upset 'cause it'll be months before Fuzzy 'Brows doesn't have to use it, and when he takes it off, the leg will be weak…' _

"He… he feels guilt…" Temari said, shocked. She dropped the letter with shaky hands, understanding Gaara's pain.

It was he who messed Lee's leg up in the first place.

It was he who was making it so that Lee could possibly spend his entire life in recovery, which would mean that he might never achieve his dream.

It was his fault, bottom line.

"Am I not human?" Gaara's cold voice asked from the doorway. "And I would appreciate you two not going through my personal letters, siblings or no," he said coolly, acting as if it didn't matter.

They knew the façade was a false one. They knew that he was feeling terrible.

"I'm going to Konoha, tomorrow," Gaara stated. "You two can take care of paperwork yourselves," he said simply. They didn't argue, just nodded slowly.

"How long will you be gone?" Temari asked.

"Months," Gaara replied, using as few words as possible.

----

"Why are you following me?" Lee whined, feeling somewhat nervous that Gaara was constantly following him.

"Because I have a right to," Gaara said simply.

Lee sighed, and Tenten growled, "You bastard, if you're trying to get him while he's weak…" She let the threat hang in the air, but flashed him a glimpse of her sickle. He didn't even bat an eye. What he was even remotely worried about, however, was the look Neji was giving him…

"I'm not. I feel like escorting Rock-san," he said simply.

"If you're going to hang around me, at least call me Lee… kun," Lee added on as an afterthought, not wanting to be misunderstood. He blushed lightly at his almost mistake, unsure of why it mattered so much.

"Right… Lee-kun," Gaara said, trying the name out.

"Kazekage-sama, I believe it would be in your best interest to see the Hokage-sama," Neji said, his voice cold, putting a barrier between Gaara and the three of them—hopefully.

"Why should I see the Hokage? I am here on vacation. I'll visit later, so she's aware I'm here," Gaara replied unfazed.

It was going to be a long vacation.

----

Gaara didn't need to sleep, still, even without the Shukaku. He was so unused to sleeping that he just stayed up, insomniac even though he was without the burden of the annoying demon. He just constantly drank coffee, which lay in a thermos beside him as he watched Lee's bedroom window. Lee could have, if he wanted to, have him arrested for stalking, but that would be rude, and Lee didn't want to hurt Gaara's feelings. Tenten threatened to report it, but Lee knew that, if Lee didn't want her to, she wouldn't, she would just threaten to. Tenten was, after all, big on threats she couldn't (or wouldn't) fulfill.

When Lee awoke, he would glance outside automatically to see Gaara and sigh. He'd roll out of the bed, shirtless (but with green boxers on), close the blinds, and get ready (which took extremely long, for he did have a crutch). Gaara kept contemplating helping him dress, but he always threw the suggestion aside, for he knew that Lee wouldn't accept. Besides, it was good for him to do something on his own, in the comfort of his own apartment, with no one to help him. It made him feel like he was still human, and not a cripple.

So, Gaara would climb down from the roof—never in a hurry, never wanting to make a dramatic entrance. He'd stand at the door, the only exit Lee could go out of in his current condition, and just wait for the green-clad boy to come out. Then, Gaara would follow him to wherever Lee had to go, giving him privacy in only the most uncomfortable moments (such as, when he needed to use the bathroom). He wouldn't say much, unless he was addressed. So Lee decided that the best thing to do would to have a constant conversation going. As long as Gaara felt more like a friend than an escort, Lee didn't mind the stalking much.

'Nice day," Lee began lamely.

"Hn," Gaara said in reply, not wanting to make the boy think he was uninterested, though he really was. Small talk was never good.

"I hope I get out of this cast soon…" Lee muttered, glaring down at the offensive object.

"…" Gaara said nothing, but felt an inward pang of guilt.

"You could at least try to make conversation, Kazekage-sama," Lee said with a sigh.

"Gaara," Gaara stated suddenly. Lee's attention shifted from in front of him to Gaara, tripping as he did so, as he was not concentrating on his path.

"What?" Lee asked, shocked.

"If I can't call you Rock-san, then there is no way I'm going to be called Kazekage-sama," Gaara stated simply, as if it had been obvious.

"Fine, Gaara-san," Lee said with a sigh.

"And drop the 'san'. I'm calling you with 'kun'. If you are going to hang around someone, at least ue the honorific, or lack of, he or she uses. Got it? It makes the other feel… uncomfortable."

"Okay."

"You're the one giving one syllable answers now, Lee-kun," Gaara muttered.

"You sound like you're on edge…" Lee offered.

"Yeah. I'm low on caffeine," Gaara explained simply, massaging his temples. He was beginning to get a headache from caffeine withdrawal, not to mention becoming just a little testy.

"… Want to get some coffee?" Lee offered.

----

Only one thing was going through Gaara's mind. _It… felt… like… a… date._ Gaara had pulled out the chair for Lee, allowing him to sit. Gaara had taken the crutches aside, as if he was trying to be gentlemanly. He had ordered for Lee, who wasn't much of a coffee drinker. He had paid the tab himself, since Lee accidentally forgot his wallet.

It seriously felt like a date—to both of them.

But what was really strange was that they didn't care. They ignored the looks everyone was giving them. They chatted, acting as if nothing was wrong. The only way it could have gotten more date-like was if Gaara had dropped Lee off at his apartment and given him a movie-romance kiss goodnight.

But they didn't care that it felt like that.

When things feel like that, you should care, especially if you weren't on a date. The air should be so thick around the pair that you could drown in it.

But… it didn't.

Gaara and Lee left, still pretending to be oblivious to the looks they were getting.

They were silent, not saying a word. But it wasn't uncomfortable, not anymore. Lee, who really didn't like being silent, started conversation with a question that had been bothering him all day.

"Why don't you sleep?" he asked out of the blue, slightly startling Gaara (though he'd never show it).

"Because I don't like sleeping. It seems like a waste of time," Gaara decided. Yes, that sounded like something his former self.

"Okay. Now, tell me the truth," Lee said. It was bad when Lee wasn't buying something, as Lee was one of the most gullible ninja you could find.

"No," Gaara stated simply.

"Is it because you're afraid the Shukaku will get you in your sleep?" Lee asked, his curiosity showing.

Gaara never replied to the topic, not wanting to explain that yes, he was afraid—the torture a demon can inflict when you try to sleep is overwhelming, especially from the inside. He'd bring up terrible memories, memories that Gaara had long ago stuck in the back of his head, or at least, tried to.

Lee decided it was in his best interest to change the subject. "Did Naruto tell you about Neji and Tenten?"

"No," Gaara replied. If something romantic was going on between them, it would make sense for Naruto to not tell him. After all, Tenten and Neji had very little to do with Naruto, and even then, Gaara didn't care for them much. Neji, in his opinion (though he knew he could be the same way) acted as if he had a stick up his ass all the time, and Tenten completely filled the requirements of "the weakest bark the loudest".

Or at least, in Gaara's opinion.

"They've been engaged. Hyuuga-sama thought he was doing a favor. But, really, Neji… isn't that way. And Tenten… I don't know. I think she is asexual, or something. She's never made a pass at a guy, or a girl, for that matter… It's terrible. They're being forced to marry, even though it will be the most uncomfortable thing for them. Neji and Tenten will probably never be able to have kids," Lee said with a sigh. "Which—"

"Why won't they be able to have kids?" Gaara asked, having not picked up on Lee's subtle clues that Neji was gay. Or at least, he pretended not to. Really, he just wanted to embarrass him. Which was terrible, considering he was only hanging around Lee because he felt bad.

Lee blushed a deep, vibrant red—just as Gaara predicted. "Well, you see, Neji…. Won't, ah… He won't become… You know…. He can't have a…" Lee began, trying to find the words that he wasn't mortified to say.

"He's sterile?" Gaara asked shocked.

"No!" Lee gasped out, shocked. "He… He's…"

Gaara decided the game had gone far enough. "Gay?" Gaara offered with a small smirk.

"You knew all along!" Lee accused.

"Me?" Gaara asked.

----

Behind the bushes, Tenten and Neji growled as they realized they were being talked about.

'_Bastard… can't keep his mouth shut…' _Neji thought.

'_Asexual my ass. I'm straight, and thrilled to be getting married to Neji, other than Neji might have to have a… mister? On the side…'_ Tenten muttered to herself in her mind.

----

They spent the rest of the days Lee was in the cast together like that, flirting, but not meaning to, but on the other hand, not feeling awkward about flirting. It was a new experience—for the both of them—to be feeling normal around a guy, especially when it felt like you were dating. Neji and Tenten even got tired of their roundabout way of dating, and finally decided that Gaara's intentions were pure and returned to training rather than stalking.

And then the day came for Lee to take his cast off.

Gaara had been waiting for that day, and even told Lee so. Lee was expecting him to go away the day that he got the cast taken off. But even though Gai, Tenten, and Neji were all present for the cast's removal, Gaara stayed by his side, silently watching as the doctor cut the cast off his leg.

The leg was fragile looking, withering, and pale. It had had hardly any exercise in all the time the cast was on, and since the only leg supporting him was his other, the difference between leg muscle in the legs was vast.

Gaara didn't leave the day after, either, which shocked Lee more than Gaara being present for the removal of the cast.

When he asked Gaara why, he simply shrugged and said, "I like being here with you."

That line would have been the romantic, dramatic ending to a romance movie. But, Gaara made no move for the expected kiss, the chaste way the movies always ended. He just kept walking, leaving a dumb folded Lee in his tracks. Finally, after the shell shock wore off, Lee jogged ahead to meet him and demanded him to explain his comment.

"I like you. A lot. More than I should," Gaara explained, looking him dead set in the eyes. His bluntness, even in the matters of love, was always amazing to Lee, but right now… right now, he just couldn't comprehend it.

"How… how long have you…?" Lee asked.

"Since the first day we were left alone together. I… I have been wondering. Would you like to come… come to Suna for rehabilitation? We have better rehab centers than Konoha, and I thought you'd like it," Gaara explained.

"One condition," Lee said with a smirk.

"What?" Gaara asked with a frown, not liking his tone of voice.

"You sleep, damn it. You just sitting up there on the roof is getting… creepy," Lee explained with a fake shudder.

"One condition," Gaara said, licking his lips. "You let me sleep in _your_ bed," he said, his voice husky.

As Lee blushed, Gaara noticed the small but quick nod Lee gave him. 

**A/N: Random. XD GaaLee-ness forever!!!**


End file.
